Despite the scripted opener, in which Danny talks to the "internet", as if it's this futuristic being, the whole of this first show is really an hour-long feeling the way, and on-air rehearsal for what the ADBS was to become. Danny's regular radio shows are fuelled by listeners calls in response to the kind of categories that every no good-nick zoo radio host now adopts, somesay copies. In Cyberspace, however, with shows recorded in the future, the immediate caller response isn't of course possible.
In this first show, "like a magazine, we'll have to make up the letters page", which takes the form of calling up regular listeners/contributors from the "earth-bound" shows, namely "Sharon in Sutton", "Keithy Baby, Baby Keithy!" and "John".
As the "theme tune", a karaoke version of Candyman kicks, todays co-host David Kuo is introduced. Kuo's on-air relationship with Baker began back in the BBC London Breakfast Show days, where he would appear to present the latest financial news, being as he is a genuine, bona fide financial adviser. Baker, never your regular straight-laced radio presenter would use the spot to riff on the preposterous nature of David's stories making for far better radio than was ever intended. Kuo, as a consequence became a great foil for Baker, and would eventually become an occasional co-host on Baker's Afternoon Retreat shows, where he would become known for the bizarre episodes from his personal life and wheezy giggling.
To give new listeners a proper introduction to Kuo's stories, David is coaxed into telling the "Chicken story", which involved his childhood family pet chicken, complete with claws painted with nail varnish, being served as a meal.
Next, the first of the "callers" is brought in, Sharon from Sutton, a hairdresser, who is strong-armed into declaring that this venture into podcasting is the future, following her initial response that it will never be as good as proper radio. Back-referencing Sharon's previous correspondence on the "other shows", her story of her Mother's hobby of taking carrier bags, cutting them up and fashioning them into other multi-coloured bags is wheeled out.
A record is played "Rose Of England" by Nick Lowe (Happy Birthday, Nick!), before the second "caller" is brought in, "Keithy Baby, baby Keithy!", a regular correspondent from many of Baker's previous shows. During the call, Danny, apropos of nothing plays a couple of clips of Bing Crosby swearing during a recording session, and Keith reveals that, as part of one of Baker's previous "giveaways", he is eternally "Dr John" from an "adopt a rock star" feature, and upon recently meeting the actual Dr John, informed the legendary bluesman that he was him. Danny riffs on this idea, and how Dr John may have reacted to the news that a 6ft plus white bloke, "and rangy with it" was his alter ego: "man alive, I'm back on the pipe!"
Another one of David's stories from his personal life is prompted by a reference to a category from the earthbound BBC shows of "When Adults have cause to hide" and involves David, at the request of his wife clambering belly-style into his next door neighbours garden to discover why their garden was blooming and the Kuo's was not, only to discover that it was full of fake plants and plastic flowers.
Next up is a song accidentally played from Baker's collection of the oddity from a children's record of a version of the Pink Panther theme performed by a cove with an unfortunate speech impediment, rolling his R's: "the winky dink panther". This is followed by the song that Baker had intended to play, "My Community" by Tiny Tim, played as a possible illustration of the community spirit that is hoped that the ADBS will spawn, as Baker's previous shows have done.
The final caller "John" is brought in, with yet another retelling of former glories, John's being that he once tried to dispute Danny's ongoing claim that "glue doesn't work" by explaining that he once successfully superglued a false tooth cap that had fallen out, back among his regular teeth.
A feature is introduced: "Shoot me, I'm a session singer!" which hopes to reveal how some aspiring vocalists and musicians have paid the rent on their ascent into the showbusiness. Today's offering is a lacklustre version of the "Top Cat" theme (from the same album as the Pink Panther tune earlier in the show), with the weakest of musical arrangements - "That's reggae, aint it?" Danny comments, his voice laden with pixie-ish sarcasm - and vocals by a female singer with ideas above her station - "excuse me, Miss, are you Ella Fitzgerald?".
"Peter! Peter!" bellows into what turns out to be a silent phone line which is by way of introducing the show's special surprise guest, Peter Kay (despite his appearance being announced in the original download's heading). There are several attempts to connect to Kay, to no avail, before playing for time, and trying to coax another story from David which he duly does until being cut across mid-flow as Peter finally appears on the line. A slightly awkward, yet amusing conversation ensues, with Kay and Baker exchanging their recent forays into the world of musical theatre and Peter cheekily asking of Danny "so, when are you jumping ship then?" ..."remortgaging your house on a dream", with reference to the planned breakaway from the BBC shows.
And as a final burst of the Candyman song kicks in, here endeth the debut, somesay inaugral ADBS. A ramshackle show, no disputing, but Baker's talent has always been to do shows, flying on the seat of his spontaneous pants, and works well enough as an introduction to what is to come.
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